By Marcee Murray King
A shift has needed to occur in my life to grow my yoga therapy business…but there are so many ways this could occur in my life, so many directions it could take.
Not knowing where to turn, I began a practice three months ago working with Lakshmi that I found in a book called 11 Karmic Spaces by Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati. It starts with chanting with my mala 108 times, “Om Shreem Maha Lakshmi Yeah Swaha.” This is followed by drawing the breath and energy in through the crown chakra, down to the root chakra and breathing here five times. Drawing the energy up to the sacral chakra and breathing in here five times; drawing it up to the solar plexus, holding the energy here and letting it swirl around clockwise while stating your heart-felt need to Lakshmi. When this feels it has taken root, drawing it up the heart chakra, really feeling the energy radiating out, as if it is already manifest, and saying 21 times “I am grateful” then holding the energy here for a bit. It is very powerful.
So much started happening right away, and energy is shifting. Doors opening a crack…and then shutting, which pushes me to seek more….and another door opening…and then shutting, with suggestions on new avenues to pursue. I recently added in chanting to Ganesha, The Obstacle Breaker, as well, “Om Gam Ganapataye Namaha.”
And now I am here today—all roads leading here—needing to make that final decision, that huge financial commitment, adulting.
I have tackled the financial end, looked at numbers and made projections, consulting with the local chamber and a business savvy friend. I have consulted with others already doing what I am interested in doing, with the huge pros and cons lists. I have asked others to meditate and pray for me. I have had three different astrology friends all look at my chart and got the same answers—go for it! I have read my two decks of oracle cards, with my favorite giving me stern reminders about my lesser personality traits, reminding me not to let these get in my way, while at the same time giving huge yes’s! I have discussed and analyzed…
But I am stuck in fear—fear of the unknown. Fear of the financial commitment. It so easy to take a step that is less of a financial risk. At the same time, it is impossible to move forward into our dreams without taking that risk.
Yesterday, I told my friend, “I just want to DREAM about it tonight…some good dream as a sign!”
So, last night as I was half awake, stumbling to the bathroom, I was trying to remember the dream I just awoke from. It was about this, and it was good—very good!
I can’t remember any of it today, but it was there. My friend I told this to said that she, too, dreamed about it, and that it was a really good dream.
After all of this affirmation, after my heart being half-way already there, I am still terrified of taking this step, so in a mini last-ditch act of desperation (or immaturity) I decided to consult the 8 ball because it knows everything and it is always right (snicker)! I sighed and asked it, “Is this the right decision?”
…And the answer from the 8 ball?
“You may rely on it.”
Photo: author provided
Editor: Dana Gornall
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