That is what good therapy offers that a cushion cannot. The cushion is solitary, and the perfectionist is already alone with the judge. A therapist is a second person in the room, one who can notice the judge with you, name where it came from and help you test whether its warnings are still true.
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Research on loving-kindness meditation has linked it with more positive emotion and a greater sense of connection with others. But you don’t need a study to feel what happens in your chest when you think of someone you love. That softening is the whole point.
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When I look back at my younger self, convinced that the right words could change the world, I can see how much of my own language was a performance. Articulate, passionate, and filtered.
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But even though I have found peace and stillness through my meditation practice and Buddhist teachings, I still grieve.
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One summer, the rain did not come. The streams slowed, and the air thickened. Passerby’s worried for the Lotus; they built a channel to bring water from the hills to the pond below. The water came trickling in clear, cold, and full of mountain spirit. And in it, drifting upon a twig, was a single Wildflower seed.
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