By Nina Rubin


Hi Nina,

I have a dear friend who means the world to me.

She has seen me through thick and thin, through good times and bad. She always has great advice and never acts like I’m a burden. We’re both busy people and sometimes it’s hard to get together, even though we live pretty close to one another.

How do I show her how important she is to me? What a great role model she is? How positively she has impacted my life? I feel like words aren’t enough.



Dear Emily,

Your question is such a joy to read! Just asking about this is loving and shows how deeply you care about your friend. I have some ideas about letting her know.

Since she lives nearby, perhaps you could invite her to do little things with you, like errands, just to spend time together. Maybe some of the time you share together can be spontaneous, rather than pre-planned, if your schedules allow it.

Could you also send her a note in the mail expressing your gratitude? What if you text and call her when you’re thinking about her to show appreciation and ask her how she’s doing? Little gestures are easy and special. If you see something that reminds you of her, take a picture of it and send it to her.

I bet your friend feels similarly.



*Do you have a question for Nina? Send her an email at


Photo: splitpeavintageblog/tumblr

Editor: Dana Gornall



Nina Rubin

Nina Rubin, M.A., is a native New Mexican living in Southern California. Coming from a long line of entrepreneurs, she runs her own Gestalt Life Coaching practice and is starting a food company called The Gourmet Therapist. Originally trained as a Gestalt Psychotherapist, Nina practices as a Gestalt Life Coach working relationally with clients in the present moment. Helping clients gain insight and awareness, identify their needs and create action plans to achieve their goals is her primary focus. An avid cook and baker, she is constantly trying new recipes and looks forward to hosting a breakfast pop-up restaurant. Having flirted with the idea of writing for many years, Nina writes for her blog, Afterdefeat. She is always trying something new or connecting with dear friends and can be found at Sunday meditation sanghas, yoga classes, playing scrabble, and hosting dinner parties. To learn more about working with her, visit Coaching by Nina Rubin.
(Visited 282 times, 1 visits today)