The Lunch Lady is Real and the Buddha is Too

It was about time I contemplated the Buddha on his lotus in that far away Nirvana land. Who was that guy really? I heard he was a prince or some kind of royalty. Sure, I followed him in spirituality but he was like my mother the Queen and the lunch lady – out of reach. I had to make the Buddha real somehow. I knew I would have a better relationship with this guy if he was human, just like me.